


Blueberry Pancakes

by self_love_guru



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Eddie has anxiety, F slur, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, Reddie, SOFT GAYS, SOFT RICHIE, am i projecting my trauma?, but - Freeform, but bowers is still here, chaotic eddie, chaotic gays, eddie is in denial, eddie physical whump, idk man, let my babies be happy, lil bit of violence, maggie will adopt eddie, mike goes to school with the losers, mordern losers?, no pennywise, pining gays, richie emotional whump, sonia is a bitch, thats a secret ill never tell, xoxo this dumb gay bitch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-08
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2021-01-25 06:55:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21352075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/self_love_guru/pseuds/self_love_guru
Summary: Sonia Kaspbrak warns Eddie of a threat with a bespeckled face. But he's there when Eddie needs help.look in the tags for more info
Relationships: Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Bill Denbrough & Eddie Kaspbrak, Eddie Kaspbrak & Stanley Uris, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 10
Kudos: 195





	Blueberry Pancakes

**Author's Note:**

> this was inspired by a post on tumblr
> 
> there is use of the f slur and bit of violence but only briefly and not graphic, stay safe wile reading
> 
> <3

Eddie stood by the front door of the house, bag slung over his shoulder when an open magazine was shoved in his face.

“Mommy, what-“

Eddie-bear, you need to see this. It’s a list of warning signs to tell if you know a fag. You need to be careful around that Tozier boy-“

Eddie’s heart rose into his throat. He snatched the magazine, kissed his mom’s cheek, and ran out the door to his bike. He pedaled to the high school, knuckles white around the handlebars, crinkling the pages his mother gave him.

With his bike chained up, Eddie perched on the back of a bench and idly scanned the article.

_TEENAGERS, BEWARE OF THE “FRIEND” OF YOUR OWN SEX WHO_

  1. _Is too ‘nice’ to be true_
  2. _Wants to spend time with you alone_
  3. _Proposes that you be roommates and sleep in the same bed_
  4. _Writes you love notes as to a sweetheart_
  5. _Directs the conversation to intimate matters_
  6. _Wants to touch the private parts of your body_

_THESE ARE SOME OF THE TRADEMARKS OF HOMOSEXUALITY_

“Fuck-“

“YO! EDDIE SPAGHETTI!”

Eddie scrambled to not fall backwards off the bench. He slammed the pages closed, hiding his guilt, “Hey, Rich. Don’t call me that.”

“What were you reading? How to dress for your body type? 13 tips for mind-blowing sex?” Richie sat on the bench, resting his arm on Eddie’s knee.

“Beep-beep.” Eddie shoved the magazine into his bag, face flushing.

The bell announcing first period rang, so the boys walked into the building. Richie parted ways with Eddie to go to his first class and Eddie kept walking, meeting up with Mike and Ben.

“Hey, Eddie.” Mike smiled, “You okay?”

“What?” Eddie looked up at his friend, “Yeah, I’m fine. Why?”

Mike cocked his head to the side, “You look flushed, I thought you might be fevered.”

Eddie tried to send Mike a reassuring smile and darted off into his classroom, Ben following behind.

Bev lit up at her boyfriend’s entrance, “Ben!”

“Lee!” Ben rushed to sit in the desk behind her- which wasn’t hard, along with him slowly slimming down, Ben had sprouted like 7 inches in the past year, all in his legs- and leaned forward to peck her lips.

Eddie sat in the row beside them and said loudly, “Eddie!”

Bev smiled brightly, she had tied up half of her bob into a messy bun that was held together with a light blue bow, “Hi Eddie.”

Eddie grinned as he opened his binder, “Hey Bev.”

As class started, Eddie found himself thinking about the magazine in his backpack and his mother’s words, ‘_You need to be careful around that Tozier boy._’

Eddie winced to himself. Sure, he knew the rumors about Richie, everyone did. But all the Losers had rumors about them, and none of them cared. It was an unspoken agreement between them all- none of them asked about the rumors because they didn’t matter.

That didn’t stop Eddie’s stomach from dropping when Richie was sneered at and called a fag. Eddie knew his friend well enough to know the comments bothered him, but Richie never allowed his emotions to show. He’d just close his eyes, take a breath, and open them to crack an inappropriate joke.

The first two classes dragged on, so when the lunch bell rang Eddie groaned in relief. It was still warm enough that the Losers met outside. Mike kept a blanket in his locker for the group to sit on. By the time Eddie got out to the group, everyone else was already eating. Bev was passing her smoke to Richie who was terrorizing Stan. Eddie’s heart lurched when Stan playfully tugged on Richie’s unruly curls before leaning towards Bill to avoid Richie’s response. Mike was proudly showing the pictures of the baby lamb he saved to Ben, who was practically melting. Eddie sat between Richie and Stan, attempting to save him from Richie’s antics.

“Hey Eddie,” Richie greeted him through the cigarette dangling from his lips. Bev snatched it out of his mouth.

Eddie sent a half-hearted smile to Richie before he turned to Mike and demanded to see the baby. Mike happily obliged and Eddie cooed over the lamb as he nibbled at his sandwich. He glanced over to find Richie staring at him. There was a sad, contemplative look on his face. Eddie sent him a puzzling look before turning back to Mike. He could still feel Richie’s eyes on him.

“Aw, he’s still so small!” Eddie gushed at a picture of the lamb curled up on a blanket with Mike’s dog.

Richie snorted, “That’s what she said.”

Everyone paused to look at Richie, who had the beginnings of a blush on his face.

Stan grinned, “Did you just roast yourself?”

“Wait no!”

Bev chortled and blew smoke in Richie’s face, “You totally did!”

Richie groaned and threw himself down on the ground, “I give up.”

Eddie let himself giggle at richie’s forlorn face.

The bell rang and the Losers packed up, none of them eager to get to their next class. Eddie and Stan walked together to their lockers and math class.

The lessons were boring and definitely not Eddie’s strong suit. As his teacher discussed a new unit, he passed a note to Stan requesting a study session before the test. Stan smiled warmly and nodded.

Whenever the two got together to study, they always ended up getting off track and finding themselves at the 24-hour ice cream shop at 2 am. Nevertheless, Eddie and Stan always passed their tests, so they referred to hit as the fro-yo method and lived by it.

Eddie had a spare during the last block of the day. Bill did too, so they sat in the common area to get ahead on their homework. As usual, Bill had taken out his reading glasses and was planning out his new novel.

When Eddie took out his math notes from his backpack, he spotted the magazine from that morning. He found himself staring at Bill, chewing at his lip, and wondering if he should ask his friend about the article. The joke among the Losers was that Bill was the grandpa of the group, he was always ready to tell extravagant stories or hand out much needed advice.

Bill would know what to do.

Just as Eddie decided to ask Bill for advice, he turned to look at him.

“Yo-you okay, Eddie?”

Eddie’s stomach clenched, he took a puff of his inhaler, cheeks warming, “I’m fine, I just-“

The reflection from the fluorescent lights displayed the dust and fingerprints on Bill’s glasses.

“Christ Bill! Don’t you ever clean these?” Eddie grabbed the spectacles off his face and began cleaning them.

“W- w- w- w- Fuck! Why should I? When you’ll do it for me?”

Eddie fixed him with a pointed glare, but his grin betrayed him. Once he was satisfied by his work, he placed them gently back on his friend’s face.

“Eddie Spaghetti! Bill-a-bong!” Richie jumped over the back of the bench between Eddie and Bill, “What’s crack- a-lackin’?”

Bill frowned (ever the grandpa), “Shouldn’t you be in home-ec?”

Richie smirked at Eddie, and he felt his heart pick up speed. There was a miniature horse in Eddie’s chest, and it didn’t like Richie for some reason.

“Perhaps, Big Bill. But having Eddie’s mom as a sugar momma-“

Eddie stood hastily, “I’m going to the bathroom.”

He would have run if he was able, as soon as he got into the bathroom, he slammed the stall door shut and schooled his breathing. Once his hands stopped shaking, he went to the sink to wash his hands and splash water on his face. Eddie patted his face dry with a paper towel, and when he looked at himself in the mirror, he saw someone else.

“Hey, faggot.” Henry sneered.

Eddie moved to run out to the hall, but Patrick Hockstetter and Belch Huggins blocked his path.

Richie’s voice rang in Eddie’s head, “In times of trouble ask yourself, ‘what would Bill do?’”

“Henry,” Eddie tried to stay calm, “What do you-“

Henry pushed Eddie against the counter, the small of his back was definitely going to bruise.

“Stop,” Eddie tried to get away, but Henry grabbed him and pushed him up against the wall.

“What are you gonna do about it, fag?”

Before Eddie could respond, Henry punched his jaw. Eddie’s head spun as he collapsed. On his way down his forehead hit the corner of the counter. He felt warm blood trickle down his face from the new cut. He barely had time to cover his face before he saw Henry’s shoe coming towards him. He was kicked in the stomach so many times he lost count. Eventually, it couldn’t have been that long, but to Eddie it felt like an eternity, Bowers and his goons left the bathroom. Not before Henry spat on Eddie’s face.

Now alone in the bathroom, Eddie backed himself into the corner, trying to breathe. He wiped his face, frustrated that he was crying. When he pulled his hand away, he saw his tears mixing with the blood from his cut on his forehead.

He tried to remind himself that head wounds bleed a lot, that he was going to be okay, but he found himself panicking, unable to draw in enough breath for his quivering lungs.

He frantically grabbed at his fanny pack to grab his inhaler, but he found his midsection was missing the constant weight. His fanny pack was all the way across the bathroom. Henry must have grabbed it.

Eddie gasped and sobbed, trying to quiet himself. There was no possibility of getting to his inhaler.

“Hey Eds?” Richie’s voice came form the hall, “Jesus you must be taking a monster shit in there. Bill had to leave for his speech therapy-“

Richie turned the corner and saw Eddie, curled up on himself and hyperventilating, and his heart broke.

“Oh my God,” Richie rushed towards Eddie, slowing when the smaller boy flinched. He held his hands up and started talking softly, “It’s okay, it’s okay.”

Richie kneeled in front of Eddie, allowing enough space as to not panic him even more.

“How do I help you Eds?” Richie murmured, “You need your inhaler?”

Eddie gasped and did his best to nod.

Richie reached into his jacket pocket and produced his inhaler. Eddie puffed at it. Weird, this wasn’t the one from his fanny pack.

Richie was still talking softly, “That’s it, just breathe. Can I touch your forehead?”

Eddie squinted at him, and gasped out a quiet, “Why?”

Richie held up a wad of paper towel, “You’ve got a nasty cut, Kaspbrak.”

Eddie’s breathing began to even out, “Oh.”

“Yeah, so?”

Eddie blinked, “O-okay.”

Richie gently put pressure on his forehead, slowing the bleeding, “How’re you feeling?”

Eddie watched Richie’s face under the paper towel. Through the years, Richie had grown taller, his hair was as curly as ever, but he had traded out his thick lenses for contacts. He had grown to be quite handsome.

His voice came out as a whisper, “I’m okay.”

Richie’s brows furrowed, “Sure you are. What else hurts?”

“Stomach. Got kicked and I got punched.”

Richie’s eyes wandered from Eddie’s forehead to his cheek and hummed, “You’ve got a nice bruise coming in.”

Eddie reached up to touch his face, “My mom’s gonna kill me.”

Richie snorted, “I seriously doubt that, she’ll take you to a doctor. Hell, probably a dozen, but death is not in the equation for you.”

He said it with such certainty that Eddie was taken aback. He looked into Richie’s eyes and grounded himself there.

“Can you walk?”

Eddie nodded slowly.

“Okay, c’mon. We’re going to my house.”

Richie helped Eddie stand as he began to talk a mile a minute, “Your house? But what about my mom? You know how she gets. And once she sees me- Oh, God Richie. What am I going to do? And I’ve been sitting on this dirty floor, I-“

“Hey, it’s going to be okay. I’ll get my mom to make some homemade mac and cheese, there’s ice cream, I’ve got movies. Let yourself relax before your mom goes into overprotective hyperdrive.”

Eddie gave Richie a shaky smile, “Yeah. Yeah, okay.”

Richie retrieved the fanny-pack from the floor and handed it to Eddie.

In the hall, Eddie saw the clock on the wall, “Richie, you’re supposed to be in class!”

Richie waved him off, “Eh, it’s fine. You’re more important than burning biscuits in cooking class.”

“Thanks Richie.”

The two walked out of the school together. Eddie tensed when Richie insisted on carrying his backpack for him.

_‘Number one,’ _he thought, _‘too nice to be true.’_

Richie turned to look at Eddie holding out his keys, “Okay so, I’ll go get your bike and you can wait in my car.”

Eddie shook his head, his vision didn’t swim like he worried it would. So, no concussion, but the thought of being alone was too much for Eddie, “No, I’ll go with you.”

Richie grinned, “Can’t stand to be away from me Eds?”

Eddie huffed, there he went again, “No, I just-“

What did he ‘just’?

“I want to minimize the time spent in your stinky old car.”

Richie feigned offence, “Hey! Miss Delilah is in her prime!”

“What are you saying? Are you living in the 50’s, Richie?”

“You’re just jealous.”

Eddie rolled his eyes as Richie unlocked his bike and started wheeling it to the parking lot. It was quite a sight, watching Richie balance two backpacks and push a bike that was too small for him to hold while standing up straight.

Eddie sat in the front seat as Richie maneuvered his bike into the trunk, “I bet you’re glad you have a hatchback right now?”

Richie grinned, “Always, Eds.”

On the ride to the Tozier house, Eddie turned the radio down, “Should we invite anyone else over?”

Richie glanced at him, and turned back to the road before speaking, “Do you want to invite anyone else?”

“It’s your house.”

“Yeah but it’s your face that got beat in. I figured you’d want some alone time.”

“Alone with you?”

Richie snorted, “Yes, Eds. Alone with me.”

Eddie’s heartbeat spiked again. It took him a moment to understand why, _‘Number two, wants to spend time with you alone.’_

“Don’t call me Eds.”

Richie parked in the driveway and the boys clambered out of the car.

Maggie was in the kitchen, the scent of fresh cookies wafted through the air, making Eddie’s mouth water.

“Richie-love. I don’t know why you’re still in that class if you always end up skipping it.”

“Hi, mom.”

“Hi, Mrs. Tozier.”

“Eddie,” Maggie turned away from the counter, “Oh, my God! What happened to you?”

She delicately placed her hands on his cheeks, surveying the damage.

Eddie watched her eyes take in the cut and bruises as he mumbled, “Henry Bowers.”

Richie choked on the cookie he was eating, “Henry?! I should’ve known.”

Maggie grimaced, “That boy, I swear. I have half a mind to do something about him myself.”

Eddie shook his head, “I’m okay, Mrs. Tozier.”

Maggie looked at Eddie with such a loving gaze, his heart ached, “You will be. Come on up to the bathroom. I’ll get you fixed up, and Richie-dear, bring up a plate of cookies.”

The Tozier’s bathroom was clean, which helped Eddie’s nerves. Along with Maggie’s caring gaze, any prospect of panic melted away.

Richie handed Eddie a cookie as his mom cleaned his cut.

“Hey, mom? It’s okay if Eddie stays the night, right?”

“Of course, just check in with your mother tonight, okay love?”

***

Eddie insisted on borrowing Richie’s grad hoodie and gyn shorts.

“Richie, I have blood on my clothes!”

“Y’know what? Fine. Are you sure you don’t have crabs though, cause I don’t want to catch anything from your mother.”

Eddie glared, “If you fuck her as much as you say I should be asking you that question.”

The laugh Richie let out was obnoxious, so why was Eddie’s heart pounding?

“Touché, Eddie Spaghetti, touché.”

***

Richie and Eddie ended up in the living room watching The Shining. Maggie brought in mac and cheese (as promised by Richie) and rustled Eddie’s hair before leaving with a smile.

Eddie saw Richie stare at him from the corner of his eye, “What?”

Instead of a joke about being a mama’s boy, like Eddie expected, Richie’s voice was soft, “My mom really likes you.”

Eddie spooned more mac and cheese into his mouth, “I like her too.”

Eddie’s phone rang and he froze. His mom was calling.

“Shit.”

Richie’s voice was quiet, “Just tell her you’ve got a project to work on.”

“Wow, that’s actually a good idea.”

“You sound surprised,” Richie snorted.

Eddie shoved him off the couch, “Just shut up and don’t. Say. Anything.”

He answered the phone, “Hi, mommy.”

“Eddie bear where are you? You should have been home by now!”

“I know, I’m sorry. I forgot to call but we have a group project that’s due tomorrow.”

“Who are you with?”

Eddie glanced at Richie; he was watching Eddie silently on the floor.

He bit his lip, “Bill. I’m with Bill.”

He couldn’t look at Richie.

“You need your medications for tomorrow, Eddie-bear. I’ll-“

“It’s okay mom. I’ve got my backups.”

The long pause made Eddie squirm.

After almost thirty seconds, “Well, alright. But if you start to feel sick or anything, you call me and I’ll come get you. Their house isn’t clean-“

“Thanks mommy, bye!” Eddie hung up.

“Good thinking man, now she’ll have no idea where we are.” Richie was smiling and Eddie’s heart continued to pound.

After the movie, the boys moved to the kitchen to get ice cream. Richie pulled out all the toppings and sauces as Eddie scooped the ice cream.

“Have you gotten any news back from your universities?” Eddie glanced at Richie.

Richie lit up, “Yeah, actually. I got accepted to NYU and UCLA. Leaning towards UCLA though.”

“Jeez,” Eddie breathed.

Richie chuckled, “Yeah, East or West coast. Anyway, what about you?”

Eddie rubbed the back of his neck, “Got into UCLA.”

“Really.”

“Yeah, I haven’t told my mom yet. She’s going to flip.” Eddie ran a hand through his hair.

“Hey,” Richie’s voice was as soft as his face when Eddie looked up, “It’ll be okay Eds, and y’know, maybe we could be roommates.”

Eddie’s face began to warm, his heart thrumming in his chest, “Oh.”

Richie cleared his throat, “And, if you miss your mom too much you can climb into my bed with me.”

Eddie could hear the smirk in Richie’s voice, “Oh, fuck off Tozier.”

The joke almost distracted Eddie from the suggestion that they share a bed- almost.

_‘Number three.’_

Wentworth walked in smiling at the boys, “Rich, your mom and I are going to bed. Feel free to stay up, just remember you have school tomorrow.”

They bid Wentworth a good night before returning to the living room to watch another horror movie, this one was stereotypical and cheesy, they ended up whisper-yelling at the screen.

“Rule number one! Don’t! Fucking! Split! Up!”

“How stupid can you be?”

“No! She fell! She’s dead! Save yourself!”

“Good lord!”

“I’m glad your boyfriend died Jessica! He’s a shit stain! You deserve more!”

As the credits rolled, Eddie yawned.

“C’mon,” Richie nudged him with his foot, “Bedtime.”

Richie led the way, “Take the bed, Eddie. I’ll make myself a nest on the floor.”

Eddie stopped on the stairs, “What? No! Richie, I’m not kicking you out of your bed-“

“You’re the guest,” Richie interjected with a shrug, “House rules.”

“Well, your parents raised you right.”

“Your mom says that too.”

Eddie pushed Richie up the stairs, “Shut the hell up.”

Richie went to the bathroom to change and Eddie took a pencil and the list his mom gave him out of his backpack.

He glared at his hand as he crossed out one, two and three. Eddie wondered why he was doing it, but he shook the question away as he shoved the magazine back in his bag as Richie walked into the room with an armload of blankets.

As Richie piled blankets on the floor and Eddie rooted around his dresser for PJ’s they discussed grad plans. The Losers were planning to rent a limo and coordinate their outfits with te whole group.

“Do you think Ben is getting Bev a corsage.”

Eddie was scanning Richie’s bookshelf that was situated beside his bed, “Probably.”

“Ugh, lucky,” Richie flopped down face-first onto the pile of blankets he made.

Eddie peered over the side of the bed, “You wanted to give Bev a corsage?”

Richie turned his face to the side, “No, dummy. I want a corsage. Or a boutonniere, I guess.”

“Sucks being single.”

“Wow, your sympathy is overwhelming Eds. Really, though, I love that we’re going as a group, but I also want a movie moment.”

Eddie smirked, “The Trashmouth is a romantic?”

“Don’t joke Spaghetti,” Richie feigned distress, “I’m heart broken. Your mom won’t take me to Prom-“

Eddie interrupted, “If you stop talking right now, I’ll get you a boutonniere.”

Richie jerked up, “Really?”

Eddie threw a pillow at his head and switched off the light, “Yes Richie. If you don’t mention my mother again, I will get you a boutonniere for prom.”

The room fell silent, Eddie wondered if Richie fell asleep. He about to whisper to his friend when his voice floated up from the floor, “It’s true Eds.”

“Rich?”

Richie sniffled before he continued, was he crying? “It’s true, what they say about me.”

Eddie was silent.

“I’ve never even kissed a guy. I just- I thought I was better at hiding it.”

A small sob cut off Richie’s sentence. Eddie shuffled to the side of the bed to look at Richie. The boy’s glasses were pushed up on his head as he rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands.

“Oh, Richie…”

“My parents must know. Hell, everyone must know by now. I know that’s why your mom hates me.”

Eddie wanted to contradict that; he really did. His mother’s voice broke down the door of his mind, _‘Number five, Eddie-bear. This boy is-‘_

He slammed the door shut again as Richie whispered, “It’s only a matter of time before everyone leaves.”

“Bullshit.”

Richie whimpered. Eddie threw his hand over the side of the bed, finding Richie’s hand tugging in his hair. Gently he extracted the stressed fingers from his abused curls and intertwined their hands instead.

“No one’s going to leave you Rich.”

The boy on the floor pulled half heartedly on his hand, “Edd-“

Eddie tightened his grip, “No. Listen to me, okay? We all love you Richie. Even Stan. And your parents fucking dote on you, they’re not going anywhere. You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.”

Richie was staring at their hands, “Today- You-“ he hiccoughed, “I thought you hated me.”

Eddie’s heart shattered, “Oh, Rich. I could never hate you. My-“

Eddie wondered if there was a line to avoid crossing. Would telling Richie everything his mom did hurt him more or less than if he actively hid why he acted the way he did? Another tear slipped down Richie’s cheek.

Honesty, Eddie decided, was better; they could move forward and heal each other with nothing to hold them back.

Richie sat up now and wiped his eyes with his free hand.

“My mom got in my had. She told me you were dangerous. Gave me that damn magazine-“

Richie looked up at that, “You _mom _gave you that?”

Eddie yanked on his hand, “Shh. There’s this stupid list of things gay people do and she freaked me out. But it’s stupid. It’s you.”

“Me?”

“Yeah Rich, you. Stupid, compassionate, beautiful you. I trust you Richie, you’d never hurt me. Christ’s sake, you carry an extra inhaler for me.”

Richie remained silent as Eddie sat up and slid off the bed to sit in front of him.

“Can I see it?” Richie looked at Eddie through his long, dark eyelashes, “The magazine, I mean.”

Eddie felt a pang of anxiety in his chest, “Richie…”

“Please, Eds. I just wanna see,” Richie’s voice was so soft, and so un-Richie that Eddie slowly took his hand out of Richie’s and went to retrieve the magazine.

“As long as you remember it’s bullshit, okay?”

“Mhm.”

Richie stared at the list, eyes moving back and forth as Eddie fidgeted.

“Jesus.”

“It’s all bullshit, Richie.”

“You crossed them out.” Richie traced a finger over the pencil marks, “You used it like a checklist.”

A blush rose to Eddie’s cheeks, “I mean, I guess.”

Richie hummed before tossing the magazine to the floor, “Thanks Eddie, for everything.”

Eddie’s heart fluttered, “Sure.”

Richie laid back down on the blankets and Eddie followed suit.

“Dude, what are you doing?”

Eddie fixed Richie with a puzzling glance, “Sleeping on the floor with you, dumbass.”

Richie folded his glasses and placed them on the nightstand, “What about all the germs and stuff?”

Eddie burrowed into the blankets and shut his eyes, “Just go to sleep Rich.”

He felt the blankets move as Richie settled underneath them and sighed.

“G’night Eds.”

“Good night, Richie.”

Eddie chewed his bottom lip and cracked his eyes open to see Richie staring at the ceiling.

The slope of Richie’s nose was soft, and his jawline was sharp. The freckles sprinkled across his pale skin reminded Eddie of both the stars and the glint in Richie’s whisky colored eyes.

_‘Good fuck.’_

Eddie gasped for air, ‘_Not now. Please not now.’_

He tried to control his breathing, but Richie still turned to face him, “Are you alright? Do you need your inhaler?”

Eddie shook his head and shuffled into Richie’s chest, “I’m okay, just hold me.”

“Fuck,” Richie breathed.

Eddie breathed in Richie’s cologne and Maggie’s laundry detergent, slowing his breathing before whispering, “I think. If my mom hates you, she should hate me too.”

“Eddie?” Richie’s voice was gentle as he wrapped his arms around Eddie tighter.

“I think I like you, Rich.” Eddie mumbled into his shirt, almost too quiet to hear himself.

Richie’s thumb rubbed Eddie’s shoulder slowly, “What?”

Eddie lifted his head and stared at Richie through his eyelashes, “I like you.”

Richie stilled for a moment before his face broke out into that blinding smile, “Oh, my God, Eds. You’re too good. I’ve wanted to hear you say that for so long.”

Eddie bit his lip, “Sorry I took so long.”

“Don’t be. I would’ve waited my whole life for you. You’re worth it.”

The two boys stayed there, smiling at each other, Richie caressing Eddie’s shoulder and Eddie tracing Richie’s jawline.

“Now what?” Eddie was staring at Richie’s lips.

“What do you mean, Eds?”

“I mean- how do we do this? What are we? We should tell the Losers, right? And- Richie stop laughing.”

The chuckle died in Richie’s throat, but his dazzling smile remained, “I really like you, Eds.”

Eddie melted, “I really like you too, he shook his head, “Sorry, I’m thinking too much.”

Richie smiled, “No need to apologize, I like that you think things through. I like that you overthink sometimes. But don’t worry, we’ll figure it out together.”

“Okay.”

Richie hummed, “My face hurts, I’m smiling so much.”

“Me too.”

“It probably doesn’t help that you got beat up.”

Panic tried to edge it’s way into Eddie’s mind at the memory of Henry kicking him. But Richie’s voice kept it at bay.

“I’m glad you’re okay.”

Eddie nuzzled into Richie’s chest, “Mhm. Gotta sleep now, ‘Chie.”

Eddie mumbled something and as he drifted into sleep, he felt Richie gently card his fingers through his hair.

***

Eddie woke up with a sticky note on his forehead. Pulling the paper off, he looked around. He was alone in Richie’s room, under a mountain of blankets on the floor.

So last night actually happened. Richie really came out. And they held hands, and both cried and held each other.

Eddie liked Richie, and Richie liked him back.

Eddie grinned at the thought of running away with Richie to UCLA, as he read the note.

_Eddie Spaghetti, _

_Come downstairs, I’m making you breakfast._

_~clothes are optional_

Eddie groaned; Richie’s humor was still intact apparently. Ignoring the last suggestion of the note, Eddie started to looko through his closet in hopes of finding a shirt muted enough to pass as one of his own.

Finally, he made his way down stairs, donning a pink button-up with navy polka-dots.

Eddie looked out the living room window to see that Richie’s car stood alone in the driveway.

Richie was in the kitchen. The sight of him wearing his mom’s frilly apron made Eddie’s heart race. He slowly walked up to Richie who was standing over the stove. Softly, he placed a hand on his shoulder and spoke, “Hey, Rich.”

Richie smiled as Eddie moved his hand from his shoulder to the hair at the nape of his neck, “Hi, Eds. Nice shirt. How’re you feeling?”

Eddie smiled as Richie set down the flipper and placed his hands on his cheeks to study the bruise and cut on his face. He looked so much like Maggie in that moment, it was breathtaking.

“I’m okay. Bed was cold.”

Richie smirked, “Missed me?”

Eddie placed a hand over Richie’s, “Maybe.”

Richie’s face flushed, “Get some plates? I’m making blueberry pancakes.”

“You ma- You’re making blueberry pancakes?”

Richie bit his lip, “Yeah, I did. Mom left the ingredients out. Is that alright?”

“Hell yes.”

Eddie set out plates, knives, forks and a whole roll of paper towel before he saw the magazine on the table.

“Richie? Why’s this-“

“Oh, that?” Eddie jumped at Richie’s voice; he was standing right behind him. Richie set a giant stack of pancakes on the table, “I just wanted to catch you up.”

Eddie looked at the list, Richie had crossed off numbers four and five. _Writes you love notes as to a sweetheart _and _directs conversations to intimate matters._

Richie’s voice was soft behind him, “I figured what we talked about last night was intimate.”

Eddie hummed and leaned back into Richie, lawing him the option to back away. Instead, Richie stepped forward to wrap his arms around Eddie’s waist and pressed his nose into the crook of his neck.

Eddie threw the magazine back on the table and placed his hands ontop of Richie’s.

Richie’s voice was muffled, “And we don’t have to worry about number sic ‘til you’re ready. I don’t want you to feel pressured.”

Eddie closed his eyes and smiled, “How are you so perfect?”

“I hear Bill’s dad ask me that every night.”

“Richard!” Eddie whipped around to face Richie and squish his cheeks in his hands, “You are vulgar and disgusting and nasty.”

Richie grin was squished between Eddie’s hand but just as adorable as ever, “I like you too, Eds.”

Eddie flared his nostrils, fighting off a smile, “Eat your pancakes, Trashmouth.”

The two sat in silence, scarfing down the blueberry pancakes Richie made. They didn’t know what their futures outside the kitchen would hold, but as Eddie linked his ankle around Richie’s, they knew they could get through it together.

**Author's Note:**

> if any of yall are thinking, "They're out of character" listen they confess at like 1am and NO ONE is in character at 1 am so just get off my dick


End file.
